If there is one thing I hate more
than high temperatures, its sweat. Yet, sweat seems to love on me because today
I was drenched. Automatically, I was pissed off by this “vacation” my family
decided on. (It seems my mom is going through some mid-life crisis that can
only be solved with cracked earth and deathly high temperatures). Lynda (my
mother), rented an RV and jetted us, my dad and brother included, across the
country to some middle of nowhere desert to find inner peace and basically figure
her shit out.
The economy has been failing and with Lynda
losing her job she’s more unstable than the stock market. The hardest part
(selfishly, I’ll admit) is how stressful it’s been for me. Taking on more responsibility
than a normal teenage girl at home should, like making dinner for the family
because my dad picked up extra shifts at work while my mom soul searches, has
left me somewhere between a rock and a hard place. Which brings me here.
The desert. Or otherwise known as
Moab Park, Utah.
My dad though this would be a great
family bonding experience and Lynda believes the spiritual element of such a
place could only enlighten us further. What was I thinking, you might ask. Well
glad you did because I would defiantly tell you,
“This is bullshit.”
“Well of course it is.”
I whirled around to see a park
ranger inspecting the family’s RV.
“Umm, hello?”
“You do know you’re in violation of
parking protocol. This RV needs to be in the designated parking lots for motor vehicles.”
All I could think was who says
motor vehicles.
“Oh, I’m sorry we honestly didn’t
know. Where should we move the RV to then?”
“Follow me I can lead you to the
correct location.”
There was a moment of hesitation in
my step. Every speech my parents ever said about stranger danger filled my head
instantaneously. Now that I was thinking about it, where were my parents?
“I should let my parents know where
I’m going so they don’t worry about where I am.”
“If I wanted to kill or kidnap you,
I would have done it already.”
There was no moment of hesitation,
I froze.
“Isn’t that the kind of thing a murderer
or kidnapper says?”
“I wouldn’t know.”
“Fair enough.”
“Listen, this park is important and
I’m going to need you to respect the rules here, so if you could just follow me
it would make both our lives easier.”
I followed him keeping a good
distance in case I had to quickly run away. I’m glad I did because the
landscape was beautiful. High arches of rock being molded throughout the years,
long streaks of multi-colored stone surrounded me but then there’s the
sweating.
“It actually is really beautiful
here.”
“Well of course, this is nature,
this is what beauty is.”
“That was pretty deep.”
“It’s all relative. Your perception
of beauty is all based on nature. Just like the Moab here, look at the curvature
of these arches. You perceive the elongated slopes to be amazing and romantic,
just like the positive characteristics of a woman’s body: elongated legs,
dramatic curves, etc.”
“Well then I must not be beautiful
because I’m neither elongated nor curvy.”
“Rocks are irregular, strong, and
solid.”
“What does that have to do with
anything?”
“It’s my favorite part of the
desert.”
“That’s lovely but again, I’m not
following you. “
“Young girl, it’s all relative.”
“Well relative to home I’m dying of
heat and miserable so how about you explain that one. How far away are we?”
“Pretty close, not much longer. This
heat that you hate so much, is what gives life energy. Also, you are sweating
out all the toxins in your body, that can’t be so bad.”
“I’d rather have all these toxins
still in me at this point.”
“Of course you would say that.”
“Alright…”
“It’s just you’re not looking at
this in a relative perspective. You are free, you are one within nature,
surrounded by beauty and happiness. How can you then be anything other than beautiful
and happy?”
“Well I can honestly say right now
that I am anything but beautiful and happy.”
“It’s this generation.” He mumbles,
mostly to himself. “No appreciate for anything pure and good. No understanding
for what is right in this world. Always negative always destroying.”
“Uh, are we any closer? How much
farther till the parking lot?”
“Patience is a virtue, young girl.
It’s merely another 10 more minutes.”
By this point in our little
adventure I was questioning all life decisions and how I possibly got myself
into this. Regret was hanging over me like the beating sun that seemed to never
disappear.
“Look, I don’t want to give you the
wrong idea. I’m just here on family vacation and you’re the one who asked me to
walk with you. I’m not trying to have a life lesson from a stranger, uh, no
offense.”
“None taken. It’s not like you would
ever understand.”
That’s it, I had, had enough.
“What do you mean I couldn’t understand?
I understand you perfectly; you think you’re so much better than me because
what you “get nature”. What does that even matter? I will easily go through my
entire life not caring for one second about Moab or the desert or anything in
this dumb park.”
“But you see, you won’t. You will
be ignorant to what you truly wish to understand.”
“Oh my god.”
Right in front of me was a huge black
lot of asphalt. Nothing so average had appeared so amazing to me in my entire
life.
“Well looks like we found our
destination. You can park your family’s RV here in lot B2. Goodbye.”
I headed in that direction only to
relize my entire family was already parked in the adjacent lot eating dinner
with not a care in the world.
“Wait, thanks for showing me back
to the lot. Sorry for being so rude, I do appreciate your help.” I half shouted
to the retreating ranger.
“You would’ve found your way, it’s
just my job to show you the direction. Have a nice vacation and keep your RV in
this lot.”
I sat down to the barbequed styled
dinner of grilled chicken, hot dogs and macaroni salad (secretly my favorite
food). I still remember my family laughing and having real conversations for one
in what seemed like a long time. This was nice, I thought, while sweat accumulated
in my lower back, relatively speaking.
Good introduction. It reads well, while also setting us up well for moving into Abbey's world.
ReplyDeleteThe dialogue between "you" and "Abbey" is witty, but it doesn't seem like you know what you want to do with it. You have the right voice or voices (I'm not sure if you have an interesting voice for Abbey yet), but what are we trying to say or accomplish?
If unemployment and self-searching are worth introducing in the beginning, they're worth working in later on. What does unemployment mean in Abbey's world? How would he respond to it or analyze it? Much of middle-class America is in an economic crisis which at least relates or leads to a spiritual crisis. That's why I liked the beginning - because this is a very reasonable way into Abbey's concerns. But you don't actually *do* anything with that.
I liked how he leads her to an asphalt lot. Clearly that has at least implicit meaning - they belong to the asphalt world. Where *that* would get interesting is if then she left it, maybe reluctantly, to talk to him a second time.
Anyway, those are just a couple possibilities. The voices are interesting and you have some ideas brewing, but there's not much in terms of substance yet - 90% of what you need for a revision still remains to be done.