I was advised to include the "analogy vs. homology" debate within my essay, utilizing p. 95. I was also advised to analyze altruism (p. 99) through the lens of free will. The sociobiological discussion could also be used (98-99).
They said I should use the parts about genes and their environment (p30-33) and cancer's causes (p41) for more evidence for my argument.
In my peer review, Emma and Jayani encouraged me to make better use of quotes from “Biology as Ideology” to show how Lewontin would agree with my interpretation of the article about breast cancer. They said that the information on internal and external causes on page 63 would be beneficial to my argument and would help me better use Lewontin. Also, they thought that page 107 would help support my argument about correlation versus causation as it applies to genes being seen as the cause of a decreased risk of cancer.
In peer review, Madi and Jessi suggested that I use a specific quote on page 97 about the evolution of genetics and how people's genes adapt based on what is necessary to survive in society. It was also suggested that I should use details on pages 7 and 30 about the relationship between nature and nurture in development.
My group members were; Sam, Stella and Matt. As my essay is Lewontin's view on environment vs genetics and an article that discusses how much environment and genetics that cause autism. They suggested the passages on page 49-50 where Lewontin offers a solution on fixing disorders but then writes the problems with that proposition.
In my peer review, Joe advised me to use pages 15 and 74-75 and to provide more article explanation. Johnathan advised me to look into pages 66 and 68 and to possibly do more research on the two genetic disorders in my paper.
This comment has been removed by the author.
In my peer review, both Meaghan and Jessi suggested that I use a statistical quote found on page 101 about the amount of men who have had homosexual experiences in the United States. They also said I should possibly do more research on the topic to revise my essay even more.
I was advised by my peers (Madi and Meaghan) to add two separate quotes, the first being on page 123. This is when Lewontin talks about how our DNA has a powerful influence. I was also advised to add a quote from page 23 where he discusses how we differ in fundamental abilities because of innate differences.
I was advised to make my second and third paragraphs flow a little better. Also, I was told to explain the validity and importance of my long quote (64).
I was advised to use the second paragraph on page 7 about science as a social action. I was also told to shorten the essay a bit by cutting out parts that were not useful or were wordy, I also was told to talk more about "quid pro quo" and the ideas around that.
Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.